Honoring God in a Modern-Day World

I’m a Carrier

A couple of weeks after I lost Iris (my 1st born), I was at my husband’s office working on a poem and remembrance frame for my little angel. After everyone left for lunch and my husband left to a meeting, I became overwhelmed with pain and grief and consumed myself in tears. I turned off all the lights from the office and set the door sign to “CLOSED”. I remember sitting there in the back room with my arms folded on top of my desk and my head buried in them. I cried in agony, grief-stricken. Suddenly, I heard the front door open and I was confused because I knew I had locked it. I wiped off my tears but I didn’t have the strength to get up. My youngest sister had dropped by the office. I heard her call my name, but I ignored her. I just couldn’t bear anyone seeing me like that. She continued to make her way towards the back and so I whispered because that’s all I could muster, “I’m back here.” She came into the office and asked me what I was doing. I couldn’t respond. My heart was heavy. The room was dark, but I knew she could tell I had been crying. She sat across the desk from me and held my hands as I continued my crying. I know she was crying right along with me. I know God had sent her to show me He was with me. I don’t know how long we sat there in the quiet, cold, dark room, but I do know her presence served to comfort me like no words could have. I could feel her pray over me. Silent prayers of comfort. She had brought Holy Spirit.

But thanks be to God, who in Christ always leads us in triumphal procession, and through us spreads the fragrance of the knowledge of him everywhere. (2 Corinthians 2:14 ESV)

There isn’t always a need for a speech or fancy words. Sometimes our presence is enough. We speak Jesus everywhere we go, whether we say anything at all, or not. We are carriers of the Holy Spirit and His presence is prominent in us. It is marvelous to know our worth through Him. We bring comfort, joy, peace, and love without ever even opening our mouths. There will be times when Holy Spirit gives you the perfect words, and there will be times when they won’t be needed. We are carriers of the presence of God. We are the vessel He has chosen to use to reach this world. Your presence is more than enough. After all, you bring Jesus!

Mom Blogger,

Rosalinda Serna

Who Goes Before Me

I’m currently at a crossroad in my life. My youngest will be starting Pre-Kinder next week and so I will be finding myself with some time to myself. I’ve been a stay at home mom for the past ten years. While I’ve kept busy managing the finances of my husband’s architectural business and doing my writing, most of my time has been spent devoted to my family. It will definitely be nice to have a quiet house being that it’s been so loud and busy having all three of my kids home this summer.

I’m sure most SAHM wonder at times if the sacrifice they make daily to stay home is enough. Only we know how much we do and how much we give of ourselves. Staying at home with little ones is selfless. Now that all of my kids will be in school I feel I can finally do something for myself. I’ve begun working on a children’s book, which I hope to publish by the end of this year. I am also considering going back to school, but I’m largely considering starting on my career path. It all seems so unusual to me and the possibilities for my future are endless. A few days ago, I knelt down and talked to Jesus for a while. I needed him to steady my heart. “Lord, you go before me. You direct my path. I submit to your desire. Let me only take steps in the direction that lead me to you.” I’ve started the process of looking for a job. I was a little nervous at first, but I keep reminding myself who goes before me. Whatever door He closes is a part of His plan. Whatever door He opens is a part of His plan.

I recently went to my very first interview and part of me was nervous. My insecurities were getting the best of me. “Am I good enough? Do I really have anything to offer? But I haven’t had an 8 to 5 in over a decade.” I took control of my thoughts, “Who goes before you? Who is paving your path? Just put one foot in front of the other. You are a daughter of the Most High. You are a carrier of Holy Spirit. You can do all things through Christ who gives you strength.” I don’t know yet if the job is mine, but I do know one thing for sure, I did my absolute best. I rocked that interview! I’m sure I left more than just a good impression on the panel of 8 who interviewed me. I have the skills to do the job, but I possess much more than just skills. I am filled with the power of the Holy Ghost and that is something more valuable than any man can offer. You can train people to have the skills required for a job, but to train someone on attitude and behavior is much more difficult.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things, there is no law.

(Galatians 5:22-23 English Standard Version)

I can’t fully see the road ahead of me, but I have a clear view of the one paving it for me. My confidence is found in Him. May you be reminded of who goes before you. You belong to the Creator of the Heavens and the Earth. Do not sell yourself short. Walk straight in the path prepared for you. If you are under the will of God, He will lead you exactly where you need to be. Do not be discouraged. Continue. God goes before you.

Mom blogger,

Rosalinda Serna

My Family’s Keeper

The Bible says that men are the head of the home. What a grand responsibility the Lord has given them. Much in the same way that He’s given women by making us the keepers of our home. We, women, have so much power in creating the ambiance. We set the tone. The world would describe this as, “If momma ain’t happy ain’t nobody happy.” So much truth can come from that saying.

By wisdom, a house is built,
and by understanding it is established;
by knowledge, the rooms are filled
with all precious and pleasant riches.Proverbs 24: 3-4

We have been positioned by God as The Keepers of our homes. Keepers of peace, patience, grace, and love. If we are emotional beings, how can we get to a state of mind that we can become disciplined enough to contain ourselves in moments of anger and frustration? We must change the way that we think, becoming prudent. I cannot allow my emotions to control me. I’ve recently begun to ask God to change the way I react to certain situations, to change the way that I think and align my way of thinking to His. Prayer is more than just a tool, it is the foundation of a Christian home. I find that the more time I spent with the Lord, the more at peace I am, and in-turn so is my home. It’s amazing to know and understand this power my creator has instilled in me. In the moments when I choose to practice grace over anger, I am able to see the amity it brings to my family.

I desire for my home to be a haven for my husband when he comes home from work. My patience and grace is my gift to him. Providing a place of peace for him is my way of honoring him, honoring the vows I made before God on our wedding day. When my husband comes home stressed and tired from the responsibility of being the provider of our home, I serve as a place of rest. I know the power of my hand in his life. At night when he rests his head beside me, he asks me to pray over him. “Amor, ora por mi. Pray for me, Love.”, he says. I have the power, through Christ, to calm him when he is upset; to ease his worry. I am The Keeper of my home and nothing brings me greater joy.

Mom Blogger,

Rosalinda Serna

Losing Iris

There is pain that runs so deep that not even the arms of your most loved ones serve to fully comfort it. Only the Lord could mend such broken heart. I remember the nights after losing Iris as the longest most painful nights of my life. I couldn’t sleep. My heart was consumed with grief and sorrow. I longed to hold her, to keep her, raise and her and watch her grow.

It’s been almost 12 years now that I was blessed with the most beautiful little angel. To a healthy 7 lb. 3 oz. baby girl; except that she was born sleeping. She was my first-born and I was completely devastated. It’s the hardest thing in world to walk into a hospital full of hopes and dreams for the baby you carry in your womb and leave with empty arms, empty dreams and a broken heart. Sometimes God allows things to happen that are not within our control. For some reason, he chose this for her and for me. My husband became such a strong tower in my life, only he knew how deeply I was hurting because he was hurting just as much. He’d hold me tight while I’d cry myself to sleep but no matter how much he tried to comfort me, I was inconsolable. The overwhelming feeling of grief, sadness, shock, disbelief, and even a strong sense of fault and regret consumed me. I found refuge in the arms of my heavenly Father. Most times I had no words, my prayer consisted solely of crying in His presence. I knelt at the foot of my bed and wept for hours on end. I’d walk into her fully decorated nursery and grab the tiny baby girl dresses that I had hanging in her closet and weep in the presence of God. I found comfort in my Father’s arms. But even in the midst of my grief there was peace. A peace that passed all understanding. (Phil 4:7) I felt God telling me time and time again to submit myself to His will because His ways were much greater.

“Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.” (Heb. 11:1)

I now have three beautiful healthy strong little ones that fill my life with so much happiness and joy! They are my greatest reward. When I look at them, I can hear God whispering into my ear, “Well done, good and faithful servant; in the little you were faithful, I will make you ruler over many things: enter into the joy of your Lord.” Keep your head strong and your heart focused on God and let Him lead you where He may. I can assure you, you will be blessed. My testimony now serves as a blessing to others and although I still feel pain when I think about my Iris, I know that Gods purpose for her in my life was much greater than I could have ever imagined! I’ll always miss never being able to hear her laugh or cry, never being able to hear her say her first word, take her first step, her first day of school, to watch her grow, but someday I will get to hold her again.

My children are so beautiful to me. On the days when I’m lost in the chaos that having three little ones can bring, I remind myself that I am blessed. I remember those long, dreary nights that I so desperately wanted to fill my arms with their presence and now I am rejoicing in this moment for my time has come! Keep your focus on God, He will see you through! Submit yourself to His complete will and watch His ultimate plan unfold in your life.

“God is my refuge and strength, an ever-present help in times of trouble.” (Psalms 46:1)

Mom of an angel,

Rosalinda Serna